Archive for April, 2011

Blogophilia 5.4 – A Crazy Twist of Fate

April 4, 2011 37 comments

Announcer: Ladies and Gentleman! It is time for another edition of America’s best loved game show… Family Feud. With your new host, Charlie Sheen! Let’s have a warm round of appreciation… Stand up and clap. Cut.

Director: Let’s just keep moving, Don. We’ll use stock footage for the audience on this one. Audience, you can file out.

Charlie: Welcome everybody. Today is a great day for a winner like me. I can do more hosting than any two and a half men could.

Director: Charlie, keep to the script. Stay focused.

Charlie: Let’s meet our contestants. This week is a celebrity challenge and we have a team from the unreleased movie Zodiac facing off with and all-star ensemble from the movie Kaleidoscope.  Starting with Zodiac, David II. Producer, Director and author of the new bestseller See Mankato on Ten Bucks a Day. Welcome to the show. Who do you have with you today.

David II: Sallon Newlove, producer and author of The Woman Behind the Green Diaries of Sallon Newlove.

Charlie: Shall we have a kiss? Mwah. You ever need to a place to crash, just stay with me and my girlfriends.

Director: Charlie, stay focused on the show.

Charlie: And then Tyler Myrth. A choreographer who specializes in tap dancing? Fascinating I’m sure. Let’s move on. D. J. Myke, a record producer from Tennessee who has just released a new Metal Goth CD set called The Best Damn Goth Banjo Picking from Austin City Limits. Far out album, but needs more cowbell. Just speaking as a winner to a winner. And it appears the last member of the team is a bear? Is this thing dead?

David II: That is Zodiac, I’ve hypnotized him for your protection. SGI’s Lissa and the Falcon are standing by as expert in dangerous animal control, just in case.

Charlie: OK, now to the Kaleidoscope team. Sassy Sue is the producer. Can you introduce your team for us?

Sue: We have directors Clint Eastwood and Ron Howard. My client, screenwriter Ruggi.

David II: Objection! Charlie, Ruggi was our screenwriter. He never wrote Kaleidoscope.

Charlie: Ruggi, it says here your favorite sports are football, which I guess you mean soccer, and farmer golf?

Ruggi: Yes, Charlie. And the Tour de France.

Charlie: Well, he can stay on Sue’s team. I like Dutch soccer myself. Wish that damn octopus would have selected them. And the last member of Kaleidoscope is Christopher, another government employee?

Christoper: I handled the movie permit for my town on Kaleidoscope.

Charlie: Well then let’s get this feud started!

Ruggi: You were supposed to mention I am writing a docu-drama on skid row. Honey, I Shrunk the Skids.

Zodiac: Roar.

*    *   *

Director: What caused the bear to go berserk?

The Falcon: We used honey as a hypnotic trigger to attack on the movie. Don’t use the word around Zodiac.

Director: He seems to be stuck with his big, fat belly in the stage trapdoor.

Lissa: That is a crazy twist of fate, we hid pots of honey under the stage. Where is our assistant, Robin? Christopher, Robin, can we free this bear from being stuck?

Blogophilia 5.4 Topic: “A Crazy Twist of Fate”

Bonus Points:
(Hard, 2pts):Mention 3 Sports
(Easy, 1pt):Use Tap Dancing

Final date to post: April 5th, 2011 GMT midnight
Final date to post ALL GUESSES: April 2nd, 2011 GMT midnight

Categories: Blogophilia